I did not realize how receptive my daughter was to things going on around her. I had been on a major downer lately regarding not bringing Little Man home and not having any clue when with all of the problems in his country. I have tried and thought I was being successful in maintaining a pretty positive disposition around Lindze. I actually try to save the tears for bedtime or just when she is not around. Tonight at bedtime her prayer brought me to tears. She prayed for her baby brother to be home soon. She also prayed for her mommy to not be so sad all of the time and that "God please bring brother home for Christmas so mommy would be happy and not cry". It took everything I had to hold it together while I was putting her to bed. I guess I am not doing a good job of maintaining that happy disposition I was talking about if my almost 5 year old is picking up on how sad I have been. I will have to work a little harder on hiding my feelings. I don't know what I would do right now if I did not have Lindze. She is the light of my life.
Nothing new on the adoption front. Still waiting for some people in a certain country to grow a heart and sign some letters for all of us waiting. Keep the prayers coming!
6 comments:
I am right there with you.. work and home are noticing the change in attitude. We have to be positive. I am trying work through it but its hard. Hang in there! Hugs to you. b
I second the motion... I am right behind you. Trying to keep a stiff upper lip at home work and around my niece and nephews is so hard. Especially when my 9 year old niece asks when am I gonna finally meet the baby?? It is hard but keep the faith. I choose to trust the feelings and vibes coming from some PAP's who have been through this all before. I hope they are right and this dawn is coming.
Oh Christina. You are so not alone right now. I think that we are all doing the best we can to put on good faces inspite of the pain that we are experiencing. Some days are just better than others. Thank goodness Lindze. I know that my kiddos have been my driving force!
My heart aches, too.
God bless you.
Praying fervently.
I found your blog tonight.. and am so glad I did... we are also waiting... we are adopting from Kazakhstan... and I so could relate to what you were saying....
we'll add you to our prayer list...
Blessings..
Lanetta Gobble
www.gobblefamilyadoption.blogspot.com
Bless your heart...so many prayers are out there for you and others waiting. You are all very lifted up!!
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