Starting Over

So the new regulations have been signed in Kyrgyzstan. The MOU that the DOS has supposedly worked so hard on has apparently failed. My agency has to be reaccredited to adopt from Kyrgyzstan and supposedly we are being told they are only accepting 3 agencies from each country. I have to start over from scratch... update my homestudy, new I171H, new dossier, more fees for ICF to get reaccredited, possibly 2 more trips to Kyrgyzstan or a freaking long trip (leaving my babies here), finding enough people to watch my two kids while me and Tom are gone, a new job where I cannot get that much time off and of course the best of all not enough money to cover all of this. I love my boy Manas but this really is going to be so hard to fix:(

Oh How I Love Him

So today I got one of the best pictures of Little Man. He was showing off his big smile and holding a picture of his family that I sent him. I really feel like he knows someone out there loves him and wants him. I think he knows that he has a mom, dad, sister and brother out there who loves him and just knowing that makes me one happy momma. Oh how I love that boy <3

Three

Happy Birthday to Alek Manas!! I am hoping and praying that this is the last one that he has to spend in an orphanage without the hugs and kisses he would be getting here. I've had Gabe to distract me today but it is so sad that Alek is there and may not even know that today is his birthday. This is the day that our sweet little boy was brought into the world by the grace of God. This is the day that he is suppose to have a birthday cake and presents and friends and families surrounding him to celebrate his life. I sent him gifts but don't know if he got them. So sad.... I love you my little man.

Yahoo

Well Kyrgyzstan lifted the moratorium today so progress? We will see. I remain cautiously optimistic but can't help but feel that tiny bit of joy that I'm going to be holding Alek Manas in my arms instead of from afar. Keep praying guys!!!

Nothing New

Well as I have said before I am a bad blogger. I just cannot get on here and write anything as not a lot is going on. Lindze is in first grade and loving it. She is my little rhythmic gymnastic girl but man is that killing mom and dad with practice and out of town meets. Gabriel is Gabriel and I never imagined how wild a boy could be due to the fact that Lindze was the "perfect" kid. People told me she was the rare exception and I did not believe them but I do now. Gabriel is non stop into something all the time. He listens to no one at all but hey he is sweet when he gives me kisses and hugs. He is a true mommas boy which is good except that he will not let anyone hold him therefore when we go out or to church, no one can help me with him. Also I am in the middle of finding a new job or a second PRN job due to the fact that extra money will help if we can ever finish Alek's adoption. This will force me to put Gabriel in a day care or mothers day out which he probably needs. Today in church he screamed in the nursery until my mom had to go get him and bring him to me. To say the least I didn't get much out of church today:(
On the adoption front we are still waiting. I still have to renew everything but I just cannot pay to do it until I see some true forward movement. We are hoping and praying to hear that the Family Code passes all 3 areas it has to pass through. This would be the first big positive coming out of that country. I sent some items to Alek through my dear friend Teresa in hopes that he would have something for his birthday which is coming up in 2 weeks. Unbelievable that he is about to be 3 years old. I've asked multiple times for updated pictures but that seems to be hard to come by these days:(
So that is life in a nutshell. Just praying for something to happen soon with getting our little man home. My family is uberexcited that we are back waiting for him as are my friends. We just all want him here getting raised with a family and being loved as he should be versus growing up in an orphanage. So all we can do at this point is pray that the big mountain is moved and all the kids come home to their families.

Long Time and Decisions

So I'm a bad blogger I know. I am putting this out here because I need to put it somewhere. Our boy is still in Kyrgyzstan and the sweet person who was going to try to adopt him is unable to now. I have spoken with Jackie and told her I am realistic in my expectations of Kyrgyzstan and I know there is a chance that they will never reopen adoptions in that country or it may be years before they do. Anyway right now he has no one fighting to bring him home and he is there with no clue that someone here loves him so much. So we have decided to enter back into the program and try to get him home to the mom and dad who never forgot him. Jackie said since nothing has happened in the year since we left it is just a matter of updating paperwork which we are not going to do until we see a sign that something is going to happen.
The difference between a year ago and today is when Gabe, our sweet miracle, came home, he came to us when things were so desolate because fighting for Alek was just too much mentally and physically and was seriously taking its toll on me. Now I am the happiest because I feel like things in my family are complete. We have our boy and our girl and I could not be happier but then I think that yes things are great but wow wouldn't things be even greater if we could be blessed with Alek in our home as well. I have missed him so much and thought of him often in the past year. I never have stopped loving him. I held him when he was 3 months old and I still remember him holding my finger and looking at me.
So there you go... We are back in it and we have no expectations because expectations bring forth pain so we will ride this roller coaster and pray everyday that he stays safe and that this country will develop a heart enough to do something soon.